Holly's Blind Date
by Senseikkhehe
Summary: It started when Root & Foaly was worried the Holly will never find a husband so they make an account for her on this online dating thingy and set her up on some blind dates with some fellow colleagues of hers. M for some swearing. AH in the end.


Summary: Root and Foaly are worried that Holly will never get married so they decide set her up on a blind date with some fellow Lep officers.

**Holly's Blind Date  
Chapter 1**

"YOU WHAT?", screamed Holly as she found out that Root and Foaly had signed her up for this online dating program.

Foaly raised up is hands as to say, 'I'm sorry.' "I was forced to." said Foaly trying to sound innocent as much as possible. "Root made me Holly. He threatened to cut my budget again and you know that I really need money. You should thank me for writing such a nice profile of you. 10 people said that they were interested in you and they all said that they wanted to see you today at the resturant across the road."

Holly raised and eyebrow in interest. "10?" asked Holly who was starting to cool down. Foaly nodded his head. 'People are attracted to me?' and a small smile spread across Holly's face. 'No don't sound to interested. Act cool.'

"You should be proud of me for doing all that work for you," insisted Foaly now detecting a change in Holly's attitude. "Come here and check it out." said Foaly as he opened the page to Holly's profile.

It was disappointingly, to Holly, pink with lots and lots of flowers decorating the boarder. The picture of Holly was far away and blurry so you couldn't make out who it was. What you could see was that this person was dressed in an ultra mini skirt and had humongous breasts.

"You did something to the picture right?" asked Holly. "That body is definitely not mine." Holly glared at Foaly demanding for an answer.

"Well yeah," chuckled Foaly nervously. "I kinda made you look more feminine by, umm..., cutting and pasting your head on a porno star."

"This is so fucked up Foaly. You didn't even ask me before making this account and now you ruined my reputation but pasting my head on a porno star!" shrieked Holly who was getting frustrated and started to choke the centaur.

"Wait! No one knows that it's you." Holly stopped to listen. "I made a fictitious name for you so no one will really know it is you."

"Yea and what is it? It better be something decent sounding."

"Polly Port."

"What?" asked Holly as though she didn't quite hear what he said.

"Polly Port. Your name is Polly Port."

"Where did you get such a weird name such as that?" said Holly in disbelief. "That is such an uncool name. Someone could accidentally read it as Polly Pork!" Holly continued to read "her" profile.

"I am a young, hot, sexy, cute, beautiful, and gentle, elfin maid who loves children and to be able to help people. I work as a secretary at a major computer company. Hates violence, scary or action movies, and flying. Loves diamonds, rubies, gold, and silver. I also know how to cook very nice meals. My favorite color is pink and I'm looking for a young muscular hunk that can protect me for my entire life. What? This is ridicules! I'm not even near to being hot and sexy. I hate children and I love action movies. This is like completely my opposite."

"If we don't say that then who's gonna like you? No body likes a tomboy like you. Come on Holly. You can pretend to be someone else for a day."

Holly looked unconvinced. Foaly took this time to pull out a large bag from under his desk to toss it to Holly.

"What the heck is this for?"

"The date of course. I said it was today right?"

"Right now!"

"Of course not stupid. It is in another hour but you should get ready."

Holly opened up the bag to see a V-line flowery pink dress that reached above her knee, a pair of white heels, some make-up, and some little accessories like jewelry. There was also a bra in there.

"Do you think that I don't wear a bra or something so you're letting me wear some? And what is this tissue box for?"

"Idiot Holly. This tissue is for you to stuff your bra with!"

"What?"

"The bra is cup D and what are you going to fill it up with huh? Believe in me Holly. No one will know so go change and hurry. Oh I forgot."

Foaly pulled a long list out of his pocket and gave it to Holly.

"What is this for?" asked Holly eyeing the long list carefully.

"It's a list of your dates. Every 15 minutes, a new guy will come in and you will pick any of them you want."

Holly scanned the list, Billy 6:00, Kevin 6:15, Bob 6:30, and so on.

"But how am I suppose to know that it's them?"

"Ahhh.. and I thought you will never ask. I told them to bring a red rose with them when they come so whoever is holding a red rose is the guy. Act like a lady with manners okay? That reminds me, you have to have a red rose with you too so they came recognize you."

"Fine. I'll go buy one right after."

* * *

Sometime later, Holly was waiting patiently for her blind date to arrive. It was already six and he should of came by now.

"Where the hell is this bastard?" grumbled Holly as she slammed her fist onto the table.

Holly was not having a good day. The heels she was wearing was killing her feel and her dress was too pink for it's own good. Holly's breast was too big too. She kept on knocking things over with them. Holly sighed and instantly jolted up right when she spotted a man with a red rose in her hand.

When she looked at the man's face she almost shrieked.

"Chix?"

Chix nodded his head.

"Holly?" Holly immediately turned pink like her dress. This is so embarrassing. Having a colleague see her in a dress. Her reputation at work will be ruined. Got to think fast.

"No. Oh no, no. I'm not Holly," she quickly lied. "You know Holly? She's my twin sister. We were separated from birth."

"Oh, really? Then how do you know me?" Chix seated himself down across from Holly.

"Yea. Um and my sister speaks of you all the time." Holly faked smiled and crossed her legs like Foaly said.

"Well that's something good to hear." And it was then that Chix's eyes caught Holly's big boobs. He couldn't help but stare at it. It was too huge for an elf's. He was mesmerized just by the size of it.

"Wow.. Your breasts are so big. Can I squeeze them?" Chix uncontrollably said and two streams of blood dripped for his nose.

Holly immediately kicked back into her senses and punched Chix. right in the face.

"You pervert! Go to Hell!" Everyone looked to Holly's direction.

Chix fell to the floor and was bleeding badly.

"I thought the description said 'gentle'? This is some crazy chick." and he ran off back home.

Meanwhile, Holly sat roughly back down. She noticed some other people staring at her. After shouting, "What do you want?" everyone turned back to what they were doing earlier.

"The next guy better not be someone I know," muttered Holly to herself.

* * *

At 6:15, Holly's next date came. He was Trouble Kelp.

"Are you Polly Holly?" he questioned Holly.

"Yes. Trouble, you're Kevin?" 'Please no.'

"Well yes I am."

'Darn it!' Holly forced a smile and said, "Please sit down." She wasn't too happy with the date but she had to give him a chance.

Trouble didn't move an inch. He looked nervous and didn't seem like he wanted to stay. 'Are you kidding me? Holly was Polly all this time? She doesn't look like the type of girl who likes children. She isn't even pretty. Oh no. I'm not going to get with a person like her. I wanted a princess like girlfriend. Someone who wouldn't talk back to me when I yell at her. Someone who is weak and needs protection. Someone who knows how to cook,' thought Trouble.

"It's a surprise to see you here." and he reluctantly sat down.

To start conversation, he said, "So you know how to cook? I never knew you had that skill."

"Holly's eye lids twitched dangerously, 'was that an insult?' "Yes! I do. I took classes when I was small."

"Tell me about what you can make."

"Ummm..." Think fast Holly, think fast. "I know how to make eggs and a hole bunch of other stuff but you wouldn't know. Let's order some food! I'm hungry." Holly said to change the subject.

They opened up their menus and Holly raised her hands up to call the waiter over. It was then that Trouble spotted something black in Holly's underarm. It was hair! 'God she hasn't shaved her pits in months or something.' Trouble couldn't help but look at the hair as Holly waved her hand for the waitress to come.

"Um Holly," Stuttered Trouble. "I have some unexpected things to do. Would you excuse me. I'll make it up for you at work next week." And Trouble hurried out of the resturant.

'That's odd. It was going good so far.' Holly thought.

Then she decided to take a short trip to the restroom to check on her make-up and as she past the resturant, she saw the backs to two male elves. Both were holding roses and Holly could make out that one of them was Grub.

'Why is he here?' Holly decided to do some eavesdropping. The conversation was loud and Holly heard every single word.

"You're hear to see Polly too Grub?" That was unmistakably Trouble's voice.

Grub nodded his head.

"Well you can leave now and go spend the day with me."

"Why? I haven't even seen her."

"You don't want to see her." insisted Trouble. "Do you know who she is? She's Holly Short."

Grub looked shocked. "Holly? No way. That girl in the picture had big breasts. Holly's is so flat!"

"She has that genius Foaly as a friend. Fixing a picture for her is a piece of pie for him."

"Well what's wrong with Holly then?"

'Yea what's wrong with me?' thought Holly getting madder at each sentence as she started to strangle the plant tree that she was hiding behind. 'And my breasts aren't flat. They're just covered by my suit that I where everyday.'

"She doesn't shave her armpits. Talk about bad personal hygiene." and Trouble shook his head in disappointment. "She's too bad for you Grub. Let's get something to eat."

Grub looked sad. The girl he has been dreaming of all night was in fact a fictionist character created by Foaly. He sighed and walked off with Trouble to go eat.

* * *

Behind the little plant tree that Holly used to conceal herself, was a female elf getting angrier by the second.

* * *

A/n: How was it? Please review because I practically lost confidence in my writing after my two stories that I wrote had no reviews. 


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